All good things come to an end. And while I might not be ending the blog, I feel like there has been a significant shift, personally, from my perspective from when I began it, back in February 2015, to now.
The main difference, I feel, is that I am far more settled into the role of supply teacher…sorry, freelance teacher, and I no longer feel half as embittered as I did back when I left full time teaching. Maybe I’ve just gone through the processes of grief, from anger, denial etc all the way to acceptance. Maybe it’s that I’ve recently got involved in another pet project that occupies a lot of my spare time but I don’t feel the inclination to write so much any more and I’ve certainly not the inclination to go on Twitter and get any sort of following there. Twitter just seems to be a mire of people shouting opinions and insults or ranting on about the debate of progressive vs. traditional education. A debate, I don’t think I’ve ever experienced voiced in the ‘real’ world (ie, an actual school).
As an aside, the trad/prog debate mostly seems to be people on the internet shouting that anyone who doesn’t follow a certain dogma of traditional education must be a ‘progressive’ who isn’t interested in teaching kids anything except how to discuss feelings (I’m obviously being belligerent, don’t bother responding to it. I do find traditionalists to be appear quite reactionary if you say anything contradictory to their education worldview).
Maybe it’s because the agency I’m with have been great and got me placements in good schools that I don’t feel as pissed off about the whole experience. Maybe I’ve accepted the different pace and work/life balance is much better for me and my family this way. Maybe I enjoy going into difference classes without having to worry about being judged everyday, deal with some idiotic parent or attend an interminable staff meeting about marking in different coloured pens. Maybe I’m just enjoying teaching, without having to be a ‘teacher’.
Whatever the reasons, I don’t feel I can or have as strong an urge to dedicate the time to the blog that I once did. Back in September, I resolved to post an average of one post a week, something I’ve kept up with since then, during term-time (apart from an occasional issue with auto-sheduling), and intend to round that off as we close down into the end of July. But after that? I don’t know.
I’ll still post stuff but mostly silly stuff (you may have noticed that my last few months of posts have generally been frivolous or short silly things, not ‘comment’ [translation: moaning]) but I doubt I’ll keep to my personal deadline of one post a week or produce as many heavy handed posts.
It’s been a pleasure but I just don’t feel as angry as I once did.